Draft 1
DRAFT 1(Edited)
BANDUNG LAUTAN API (BLA)
(Bandung Sea of Fire)
On the south side of the city of Bandung you can find a large monument called “Bandung Lautan Api,” (BLA) or, Bandung Sea of Fire. This monument was built in commemoration of an event that took place in Bandung on March 24, 1946. After the Japanese withdraw after WWII, the Dutch were attempting to reclaim its former colony Indonesia. To prevent this from happening, the city inhabitants intentionally burned their homes and other buildings of importance in the city, giving the approaching Dutch forces little to occupy and reclaim.
The huge monument (BLA) is located in the Tegallega city park. The park surrounding the monument is filled with markers that look like tombstones. In reality, the stones are mere markers, indicating the type of tree that is next to it, as well as the tree’s country of origin.
The people who's behind Bandung Lautan api:
1. Kolonel Abdul Haris Nasution (Komandan Divisi III ).
2. Muhammad Toha dan Ramdan (anggota BRI).
3. Atje Bastaman( memberikan istilah Bandung lautan api).
4. Rukana (Komandan Polisi militer Bandung).
5. Sutan Syahrir (memutuskan strategi bersama Kolonel Abdul Haris Nasution).
6. Ismail Marzuki( pencipta lagu Halo-Halo Bandung).

Hi, Yudha. It seems you are really enjoy writing. You used simple sentences that make the readers easy to understand your writing. I have read your writing and your mistakes on this writing is just in the spelling. Please check the sentence of " On theOn the south side of the city of Bandung..." you write double "On the..." Then in the sentence of "...giving the approaching Dutch pforces little to occupy and reclaim" I think it should be "forces". Overall your structure is good and I like your writing. Keep writing :)
ReplyDeleteOf course,its ma bad im gonna fix it,u can check that latter again tomorrow and it will be done
DeleteI mean soon as possible not tomorrow
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